A Pillar of Light

Good morning everyone! I hope that y'all had a great week! I just want to share a quick experience with you that I had last night. We have been inside all week, my poor companion is incredibly sick. And I being in the midst of my own darkness. I won't lie to you or try to cover anything up. Missions are hard. They push you to your limits, farther than your limits. Yet a mission is the most beautiful experience I have ever journeyed on. This has been the biggest adventure of my life. You come out and strive to do everything you can to serve and love others. I thought I would come on a mission, teach, grow, change the world. But it is quite different than that, the mission is changing my world. Last night feeling completely defeated and in a midst of darkness I grabbed my scriptures and opened to Doctrine & Covenants 105:9-14. A few months ago I received a letter from my dad comparing missionary work to combat. These verses in D&C tell us to be faithful and continue in humility before the Lord. Because then in verse 14 the Lord says: "I will fight your battles." What a comforting feeling to know that no matter how aggressive the war, the Lord is on your side. I then turned to the account in Joseph Smith History, I read the beautiful words of Joseph Smith in describing such a momentous moment in his life and one that would change the world. I read it in a different perspective this time, from my point of view, as one also in darkness. "...for how to act I did not know, and unless I could get more wisdom than I than had, I would not know;... at length I came to the conclusion that I must either remain in darkness and confusion ... or do as James directs and that is to ask of God. I at length came to the determination to "ask of God" [who will fight my battles] Now like Joseph Smith, as I have knelt down to pray "...and began to offer up the desires of my heart to God. I had scarcely done so when immediately I was seized by some power...to bind my tongue...thick darkness gathered around me. But exerting all my powers to call upon God...I saw a pillar of light." I did not literally in fact see a pillar of light while praying but I felt light. Just like the boy Joseph, I am a daughter of God. We have his son, to lean on and who will fight our battles. He knows exactly the battle we are fighting. There have been so many moments when I have knelt in prayer and just have no words to speak, yet I know that heavenly Father is there listening. These words are here for us to follow the example of the young Joseph. To help those who sit in darkness. And they have just helped one soul-mine. I know Joseph was a prophet who saw God the father and his son, even Jesus Christ. That through him the Restoration of the Gospel of Jesus Christ was brought back to the earth. Which rescued a young boy in darkness and in return he rescued so many others. And last night he rescued another one-me. I hope you see how much I love this Gospel. How much I love my Savior, for all that he has done for you, for me. I am doing my very best to fulfill my purpose here. Giving everything I have to this work. No matter how hard. I will defend this Gospel with every ounce of blood, sweat and tear that is in me. Know, please know that a Father in Heaven knows you. He is on your side, fighting with you. Pray to Him. He is waiting to hear from you. I pray for you and am thankful for the love and support that I feel from all of you. Stay safe and have a beautiful week. -- Zuster Young